An Unexpected Tuesday

Earlier this week I saw a post on our social workers Facebook page. "Looking to find a new home for an artificial Christmas tree." I noticed "J" had commented in the post that she knew of a house that needed one. Unfortunately, the tree in the post had already been spoken for. We had purchased a new tree on Black Friday and had an old tree that we could donate so I texted "J" and offered her the tree. (I am the crazy one has 3 trees up in her house. One real, two artificial. We certainly did not need a fourth!).

Yesterday I got a text back from "J" that said, "Thanks for the offer but I can't find a way to get the tree from you." I had already taken the day off work to go to Gus' preschool party and was going to spend the afternoon as Santa's helper and get caught up for Christmas. So I responded and told her that I could drop it off on Tuesday afternoon....just needed to know where to take it. She gave me an address and told me that she would meet me there.

That got me thinking. Was she expecting Gus to be with me? Did she want to see him? Would she prefer not to? She hadn't seen him since the day she left the hospital. We send pictures and texts and Gus had a FB page just for her to see but she has never asked to see him. So did she even want to? Would she be disappointed if I showed up without him?

I quick called up Joel and asked what he thought. Should we offer? Or should I go alone like I originally planned? We decided that we would offer. We let her know that it was okay either way but that the choice was hers. She quickly responded, "that would be great to see him!" So there you have it....Gus was going to meet his birthmom the next day!

Joel and I talked to Gus about it and told him that we were going to go see "J". When we explain adoption to Gus we tell him that he grew in "J's" belly and then she gave him to us to keep forever and ever. So when we talked with Gus about what was going to happen he asked, "is she gonna take me back?" As I struggled to breathe and answer him, I quickly questioned whether or not I should take him the next day. I panicked for a moment before taking a deep breath and explaining to him. "No. In fact, he was gonna stay with me and Dadoh and Penny forever and ever." He seemed very content with that answer and bounded off to play. But what a huge question from a 3 year old! I was a little nervous about how he would react the next day but decided that we were gonna go anyway.

Gus and I spent the morning at his preschool for the Christmas party. I love that I am able to take time from school for things like that. I think it is really important to share the love of learning with your kids! Afterwards we headed north to "J".

We got to her house and unloaded the Christmas tree and then went in to chat. We got to meet her roommates and Gus ran around like crazy checking out all of their Christmas decorations and found a coloring book to play with. He talked to all of them and told them stories. He "read" them a book and was a little show off. "J" and her roommates all chatted for a bit. Got a few pictures of "J" and Gus and got ready to head home. Overall it was very relaxed and I was surprised at how easy it was.

I am happy that it went so smoothly and would be completely fine with meeting up again sometime. I knew that when we chose adoption, days like today would happen. I just didn't know that it would happen so unexpectedly on a random Tuesday.

Our Lucky Penny

Our sweet Penelope!

We know that she is a future Thirty-One consultant or product model...

And because in this house we love Flat Rock football, we have one for Dadoh's sports wall....

Here was her brother at the same age...

(Don't think we ever shared this one with you guys.)

Of course we have about a bajillion and a half other photos of our little sweet pea but we will start with this!  

Whirlwind of Wonderful

So remember how I was just saying how patient I needed to be?  Who knew that my world would change so quickly!!  Keep in mind, I wrote that last blog post on Sunday night.

On Monday afternoon, we had our regular staff meeting after school.  This time we were meeting in departments.  As I sat there meeting with the other school counselor, Kathy, my cell phone rang.  I looked down and saw, "Dawn Baker".  Now for those of you who are "Teen Mom" fans, you know that Dawn works for Bethany Christian Services as a pregnancy counselor.  I immediately got anxious as I went to pick up the phone.  Kathy quickly picked up on what was happening and ran to get Joel.  Thank goodness we work in the same building and he could get down to the office quickly to be with me.

Dawn informed us that there was a baby girl born at 1:50 AM that morning and that her birthparents chose us!!  Holy moly!!  We were told to come to the hospital on Tuesday morning to meet our baby girl!

We spent Monday evening frantically pulling out all of our baby stuff.  Every baby bin from the basement was strewn about our living room and kitchen.  (And if you ask Joel, there are WAY too many bins.)  We pulled out any clothing of Gus' that was gender neutral.  Brought up the pack 'n plays.  (Yes, that is plural.) Brought up the swing and the carseat and the changing pad....

I ran to Target to pick up the essentials like diapers, formula, Dreft, a couple of baby girls outfits (so she didn't come home in blue) and Tums (I knew I would need those to get through the next couple of days.)

I had Gus stay in my bed that night (I wanted to snuggle with him and it was our last night as a family of 3) as I laid awake the whole night worrying about everything that was about to happen and crying for my little boy who had no idea that in 12 hours his world was going to change drastically.  I spent half of my night worrying about our next adoption process, praying for this baby, praying for her birthparents, praying for our family.  I spent the other half watching Gus sleep and praying for him.  Praying for the transition that our family was about to make.  Soaking up the last few hours of his only child life and praying for him as the big brother that he was about to become.  Sad that I didn't have time to do something special with him on the last day as a family of three.  It was a very long night full of anxiety and tears....no sleep.

The next day, Gus went to his sitter's house and Joel and I headed to work for a couple of hours before heading to the hospital.  Once we got to the hospital we met up with Dawn who had some paperwork for us to fill out.  She then went to meet with the birthparents for what seemed to be forever long.  She came back to get us and we began the longest walk in the world.  The hospital we were in was huge and the room we were in was super far away from the room that "S" was in.  The walk seemed to be long, awkward and full of anxiety.  (Remember the movie The Green Mile....for some reason that kept popping in my head as we made this long walk down to meet the birthparents.)

Once in the room, we met the birthparents, his mom, her mom and her grandparents.  Nine of us in a tiny hospital room.  It sure was cozy!  We had a chance to talk and get to know one another a little bit.  I was jumping out of my skin!  Pretty sure that my nails were digging into Joel's knee as I held his hand.  We were then led back to the waiting room to wait....and wait...and wait....

While we were waiting, Dawn was taking care of some stuff with the birthparents and also introduced the baby girl to her birth family.  (They had not yet seen her.)  After what seemed to be a long time, Dawn came back to get us.  We went back to the room that "S" was in.  Once we were there, "S" made a point to hand this beautiful little girl over to me.  We held her and loved her and took some pictures with her, with the birthparents, with the whole family.  We gave "S" and "C", the birthfather, a few minutes alone with the baby before we got to take her back down to the room that we were assigned.

We spent the rest of the day hanging out in that room waiting to be discharged.  The baby was born at 36 weeks so she had to pass a carseat test before we could take her home.  We had to wait a long time before the NICU had time to do the test.  We FINALLY left for home around 8 PM.  We pulled in the driveway at 9 PM to meet up with Gus and introduce him to his baby sister!

We are beyond thrilled to welcome

PENELOPE LIN ELIZABETH

to our family!  She is absolutely beautiful and the sweetest little thing!  Penny weighed in at 6 lbs 8 oz and was 18" long.  We are cautiously approaching the next few weeks as we wait for legal placement, but we are over the moon and head over heels in love with this beautiful little girl!!

More info and pictures to follow in the upcoming weeks.  In the mean time, prayers would be much appreciated as we wait out the risk period.

Impatiently Waiting Patiently

Lately I have been talking to Gus about adoption.  I have always talked to him about his birth mom and when we say our prayers, we say a special prayer for her.  I am beyond thankful to "J" for making the courageous decision to choose an adoption plan for Gus.  And I am one lucky lady to be Gus' momma!  (Sidenote- Gus likes to call me "little lady" which comes out as "yittye yady".  Thank goodness he doesn't call me "lucky lady".  That would sound like "yucky yady".  Not nearly as sweet.)  When we talk about adoption, our conversation usually goes like this:

M: Gus, where do babies grow?

G: In beyies ("bellies")

M: Whose belly did you grow in?

G: J_____'s

M: And then what?

G: She gave me to you....to keep forever!

He is little so the fact that he is starting to know about this makes me happy.  Our adoption is semi-open.  We haven't physically seen "J" since the day we all left the hospital.  For Gus to understand adoption at this young age and in our semi-open arrangement, would be amazing.  But to start talking about it and to continue to talk about it is very important.  We have always and will always be very open with Gus about adoption.  We have always talked about it and I am kind of excited about the fact that he is starting to talk about it with me.

M: Hey Gus!  Did you know that you were adopted?

G: I a doctor??

And that is where the conversation currently ends before he is off and running to play with a car or a book.  

I am such a lucky girl and I am often amazed by how much I love this little boy.  I can't imagine my life without him in it!  I found this quote below while reading an adoption blog.  It completely describes how I feel. I would just add, "and I knew that God planned for you to be mine."

Adoption has been on my mind a lot lately, in addition to chatting with Gus about it.  As you know we are currently waiting.  I learned while waiting for Gus that I am not a very patient person.  (I know...big surprise, right?)  But with adoption, we are expected to be patient.  We have been officially waiting for over two months.  We are told that it could be two years!!  Two years?!?!  My heart is already about to leap out of my chest and yet I am expected to wait patiently for that very exciting phone call.  I try hard not to think about it too much because that will only make the waiting harder.  But that is pretty difficult to do when it is a constant prayer on my heart right now.  And to make matters worse, I did something horrible today!  Yes....horrible!  I sorted through all of Gus' baby clothes.  Seriously??  What was I thinking??  First of all, I am a super emotional person of attaches easily to inanimate objects because of the memory it brings up in my mind.  I didn't do too bad sorting through the 8 boxes....got it down to 6.  Part of it is because I remember specific days that Gus wore the outfit and what he did that day and I simply can't bear to give it to someone else.  Secondly, it just makes me ache for another baby!  I can't wait for another little one to snuggle into our arms and our hearts and into all of these clothes!  (By the way, you realize that because I have 6 giant boxes of baby boy clothes, we will end up with a girl this time around.  But because we don't have any boy names picked out, we will end up with a boy.  Yes...this is my luck.  Either way, we will be beyond thrilled...but you can see the conundrum that I have here.)  After sorting through these clothes, I realized that I just need to keep moving on and not focus on what is yet to come. So instead, I read a bunch of adoption blog posts and success stories and restored my hope in what is waiting for us in the future.  While reading, I found this poster... it is a good reminder that while I am pretty impatient, I must remain calm and continue to wait patiently to be a momma again.  Check back in about a month to see how patient I am staying.

My Crazy Organizing Quest

So I came to a strange realization.  I am the most unorganized, organized person.  I want to be organized.  I try to be organized.  Many parts of my life are pretty organized.  Many parts are super duper unorganized.  I often think about getting more organized.  But lately, it just isn't working.  In my head I am super organized!  The problem is that in reality, I am not.  I have many storage unit/baskets/bins/shelves to help with this problem.  But they are not properly utilized.  I promise that I have great intentions to get organized.

With the football season ending for the Stape Fam this next week, we will have some free time to spend getting ourselves organized before competitive cheer season starts.  (This is our life people....one sport season to the next!  We have four seasons in our house as most people do, but ours are called football/cheer, competitive cheer, track and summer.  It is hard to find a lot of free time during any of those seasons.  You would think that summer would be easier....you would think.)  In addition to getting organized, I have a handful of projects that I want to to by the time I am 33. (GULP! Keep in mind that in my dillusional head I am only 27 years old.  Being thirty-something is totally freaking me out! ) So in an effort to make the best out of the rest of the school year, I plan to get organized!  Since moving to the counseling office at school, I am no longer writing lesson plans or grading papers at home, I have a little more free time to focus on other projects.  My goal is to get our home organized and beautified by next June.  So here goes...here is my plan.  I figure if I post it for all to see, then I will need to follow through with it.  How embarrassing would it be if I had nothing to show for it by next June?  Eeekkk!!  (Yes, Mom, you can remind me about this.....a few times.)

I follow MANY organizing blogs.  I even follow other blogs that talk about their own adventures in organizing.  Very inspiring!  Now if only those bloggers could come over and help me get my head wrapped around some of this.  But one thing that they have taught me was to break it down so that it doesn't seem like such a huge task.  So here goes...breaking it down.  (I do reserve the right to rearrange these tasks at any time and should we get that super important phone call telling us that there is a baby on the way....well, forget the list!  I will spend my time putting together a nursery for that beautiful baby.  But until then....I will do my best to follow my list.)

OCTOBER

1.  Organize the entry coat closet

2.  The master bedroom/closet

3.  Go through clothing to organize and donate any unused clothes.

4.  Master bathroom organization

5.  Go through the boxes currently being stored in the loft.

NOVEMBER

1.  Organize Gus' bedroom and store old clothing

2.  Sort Gus' toys.  Donate unused.  Store some for Baby Stape #2.

3.  Organize linen closet.  Reduce the number of linens we have.  I love sheets and towels.  We have A LOT!

4.  Organize my office....this might take 2 months.

DECEMBER

1.  Continue to organize my office.  (Trying to be realistic here....this will need A LOT of help!

2.  Decorate for the Christmas season.  (I know it isn't organization....but I love it too much and it does take a lot of time.)

3.  Sort through the play room stuff...again.  I am very attached to a lot of Gus' stuff so I guarantee that I will need to go through it a couple of times this year.

4.  Hang photo wall.

JANUARY

1.  Sort kitchen cupboards

2.  Organize kitchen organizers.  (I know....redundant but we have a couple of things in our kitchen that become "catch alls".)

3.  Fingers crossed...build large built-in/desk area.

FEBRUARY

1.  Sort through bookshelf/storage unit in living room

2.  Sort/organize the storage bins that are currently being stored in the garage.

3.  Paint laundry room and half bath

MARCH

1.  Finish painting project in the loft and upstairs hallway

2.  Paint master bedroom/closet/bathroom

3.  Organize photo storage on computer/online

4.  Organize computer files

APRIL

1.  Organize basement storage.  (This is the ONLY thing for this month....it may take many months to complete.  There is a lot of CRAP really valuable treasures down there.)

2.  Begin working on the landscaping project in the front of our house.

MAY

1.  Store away all winter clothing.  Fully install spring/summer clothing in the closets

2.  Sort Gus' clothing.  (I have a bad feeling that he will have jumped to the next size by then....it makes my stomach hurt thinking about it.)

3.  Continue the basement organization.

JUNE

1.  Organize garage and outdoor toys

2.  Finish up any organization projects that didn't get done yet.

3.  Plan Gus' birthday party.  (Super important and always over the top!!)

If I scroll up this post, I have a little bit of a panic attack.  I can do this....I can do this....I can do this..... I am hoping to get through #1 and #2 for October today.  I have about 11 hours left to get these two things done.  Gotta get a move on!!

Little Moments

I have discovered lately that it is the little moments that are becoming the most important to me.  The other night, I walked upstairs to discover a little boy who was up way past his bedtime.  He was entertaining himself by singing.  I took a moment to go in and snuggle with him while he sang.  I had so much fun that I HAD to record it.  I want to keep this fresh in my mind for a long time to come.  I want to remember him exactly as he is right now.  (And now I am obsessed with recording his sweet little voice.)  Of course I also want to share it with you!!  (Depending on your computer system, you may have to download the sound clip to hear it.)

The Whole World

ABC

And my Favorite....Little Lady (Gus has been calling me little lady lately...LOVE!)

Hurry Up and Wait...

I am so excited that we are FINALLY a "waiting family" with Bethany Christian Services for the second time.  What does it mean to be a "waiting family"?

• It means that we have finally finished the roller coaster of a ride we were on with this home study process for #2.
• It means that we were approved and accepted by Bethany Christian Services.
• It means that we are officially on the list of waiting families on Bethany's website.  You can check it out!!  This is one opportunity for birthparents to check out the waiting families.  (And of course we hope that they see ours and say, "Hey!  We like those crazy people!!")
• It means that I say extra prayers every day for a woman out there who is or will be carrying my baby and who will give me one of the greatest gifts in this world.
• It means that I will have to be patient.  Patience is not one of my strengths.
• It means that I will have some frustrating days when I lose my patience.  
• It means that I will be praying constantly for the little one who will join our family.
• It means that I will begin a very long nesting process. I was a Girl Scout....I was taught to always be prepared.
• It means that I will jump every time my phone rings and it is from the 248 area code or if it pops up as Bethany Christian Services, Dawn or Faith (our social workers).
• It means that I will drive Joel crazy as we try to discuss baby names....just so that we are prepared.
• It means that I will start a journal for this baby that I will keep for him/her.
• It means that I will answer a lot of questions about our adoption journey. The most popular, "how is the second adoption process going?"  My response is usually something like, "it's going."
• It means that someday soon, I will get one of the most amazing phone calls telling me that someone chose US!  
• It means that I will get to turn to my hubby and share the most exciting news!
• It means that I will be sick to my stomach until I meet the birthparents.  And then I will remain a bundle of nerves until that baby is in my arms.
• It means that I am preparing myself for the harsh reality of the "risk period" in which the birthparents can change their mind.
• It means that we will wait for months until Baby Stape #2 legally becomes a Stapleton.
• It means that I will be even more of an emotional wreck than normal.

But most of all.....it means that I AM GONNA BE A MOMMA AGAIN!!!  I am so excited to hurry up and wait so that I can be ready to meet the next little one that will capture my heart!  I can't wait!!  Stay tuned for more details about our journey!!

Home Study: Part One

As many of you know, we are in the process of applying for our second adoption.  We are very excited about the idea of expanding our family.  This time around has been tricky!  We have gone through a lot just to get all of the proper paperwork completed, physicals done, fingerprints done, etc.  We hadn't even gotten to the Home Study yet!  Well, today we FINALLY started the Home Study!  WHOO HOO!!  Those close to us know that we have been getting our house cleaned up and pulled together for this meeting.  I was asked a number of times by friends or family about what this process includes.  So here goes...

If you want a definition of a home study, you can check out Wikipedia.  I normally do not think that Wikipedia is a reliable source of info, but after looking at it, it is pretty accurate.  But what did it look like for the Stape fam?  Well, we filled out TONS of paperwork, had our fingerprints/background check done twice, health physicals done twice, recommendation letters sent in, financial and tax info handed over, checks written,  drug tests taken twice, more paperwork filled out, paperwork refilled out when they changed the forms, etc.  Today was the first of our interviews with our social worker, Faith.  (Interesting that her name is Faith, huh?  Gotta have a lot of faith in this process!)

Faith arrived at our house this morning.  Yes, we cleaned our house like crazy people yesterday and today.  Even put Joel's sister and her kids to work last night.  (We invited them to dinner....and then put them to work.  :) Thanks, Gyolai's for always helping us out!!  We owe you big time!!)  Our house is cleaner than it was when we first moved in! It will be nice if we can keep it this way!

Faith sat down with us to go over a bunch of questions and paperwork that we have previously filled out.  We talked about things like our community and the racial make up of it, safety, location of schools, hospitals, fire stations, police departments, size of our lot of land, size of our house, smoke detectors, fire extinguishers, bedrooms, bathrooms, Gus' preschool, employment, openness to children and what we are willing to accept, adoption education, family profiles, letters to birthparents, contracts and finances.  In addition to this, Faith took a tour of our house.  She took notes about what our house was like, what we had in each room, etc.  Gus was really excited to show of his bedroom to her.  Showed her his books and the pond out the window.  She of course, oohed and ahhhed over it all for him.  When she looked at my office, we got on the topic of Thirty-One.  (She LOVES Thirty-One!  I see that as a bonus!!)  Then came the bad part....the poor lady looked in our garage and in our basement!  YIKES!!!  Both are what we consider storage units!  So much junk stored in both of those places it is no wonder she didn't get lost!  Oh well....that is life!

We have our next meeting scheduled with her for next Thursday.  Stay tuned to what the rest of this process looks like!

Pinterest

Perhaps you have heard of this thing called Pinterest.  Besides reading blogs, this is what I do after Gus goes to bed.  Some people read a good book before bed....I read blogs and pin.

If you haven't heard of pinterest, you definitely need to check it out.  It is my new crazy obsession....much to my husbands dismay!  This site is essentially a social network to share ideas on EVERYTHING!  I have currently found 2000+ ideas to "pin" on my boards.  2000+ things that I want to try or I want to remember or that I want to share with someone else because they might like it.  At the rate I am going, I am going to end up on a special edition of the tv show, "Hoarders".  They will have "Hoarders: Pinterest Edition" just for me.  I cannot get enough of the ideas that are on there.  So many great ideas out there in the world and I just want to soak them all up!!  I have actually done quite a few of these already.  There are so many other things I plan to try this summer.

If you recall, one of my other favorite things to do is read blogs.  One of my favorites is the terpblog.  I have known this blogger since high school.  She is a great Thirty-One customer of mine and just recently allowed me to be part of her first blog give away.  Who doesn't love FREE Thirty-One stuff??  Anyway, the terpblog co-hosting a Pinterest Link Up.  So if you love blogs and love Pinterest like I do, you need to check this out. Lots of great bloggers and pinners!  Lots of great ideas!!

Beautiful Adoption Story

So I logged in tonight to write a new post.  Whenever I log in, I quick scan the many blogs that I follow and check out what others have to say.  I ran across this blog tonight. And after reading her post, I looked around her blog for a minute and thought I would check out the adoption story.  I had been reading her blog for a while and never noticed the tab with their story.  I will warn you....it will make you cry.  I mean all out, snotty, hyperventilating type of crying...or maybe that is just me.  Thank goodness I am home alone right now and nobody else can see this blubbering mess!!  Just a beautiful story that I wanted to share with others.  Check it out....and their blog!  She has some good stuff!!  Check out Rage Against the Minivan.

When I remember what I was going to write about, I will come back....if I don't get sidetracked by some other really cool thing.

Let the fun begin!

School ended yesterday!  I am officially on summer vacation!  There are so many super fun things that we will be doing this summer but there are also some things that desperately NEED to be done!!  We have been in this house for over a year now, we have out-of-state friends coming to visit us (WHOO HOO!!!) and we have our adoption home study.  Many reasons to get this house in order.  For those that know me, know that I like to make color-coded lists.  Organizing my organization.  Tomorrow it will all begin.  Watch out boys....we have work to do!!

5 MORE GET UPS!!

Only 5 more days to get up and get out of bed to go to work until I am on SUMMER VACATION!!!  I know that there are many out there who are saying, "Oh! It must be nice to be a teacher and have the summer off!"  Well, to be honest, "YES!! Yes, it is!!"  But that was my choice.  We all make choices in life and those of you who really want to say that to me....you should have chosen to be a teacher!  :)

I love teaching!  I love my job!  I am SUPER lucky to have my job!  I love working with my students.  BUT I am SO READY for summer vacation!!  As teachers we NEED this break to rejuvenate for the fall.  And who are we kidding...the kids NEED it, too!

Summer vacation means so many things for the Stape Fam.

1)  It's birthday month!! Both Gus and I will celebrate our birthdays in June.  I CANNOT believe that my baby will be THREE!!  Just seems so surreal!  I have been so incredibly blessed the past 3 years! I am such a lucky girl!  A few days after Gus turns 3, I turn....ummm....a year older.  But as my sister and I will tell you, that means CAKE!!  Who doesn't love birthday cake?!?

2) We get to be home together as a family all summer long!  How cool is that??  We get to be together and play.  It really does not get better than that!  I love that Joel and I both work in education.  My parents did, too, and it was awesome that we got to spend so much time together.  We always knew that there would be family trips or activities in the summer.  I just love that we get to spend so much time together.

3) I have more opportunities to do things that get put on the back burner during the school year.  This blog for example!  Unless there is earth shattering news...which isn't very often in our family, I often forget about posting new info.  As I look back on the past 3 1/2 years (I KNOW!!) that I have been blogging, I did a lot more blogging in the summer.  Clearly due to having extra time.  So watch out world....it is almost super blogging time!

4) CRAFTS!!  How many of you are on Pinterest?  You can find all of my pins HERE.  This is one of my new obsessions!  I have been pinning away and getting TONS of ideas but having no time to follow thru with them.  So....here we go!  I am ready to get my craft on!!

5) Home projects.  Now that we have been in the house for over a year, I am ready to really organize and get this place in order!  I feel like life has just been speeding by and instead of taking time for these projects, I choose to play with Gus.  I mean...who wouldn't??

6) Travel....a little bit less.  This year our goal is to cut back a little bit on our traveling.  Every summer we live out of a suitcase.  The goal this year is to cut way back on it.  Beyond visiting grandparents, and my trip to Atlanta for the Thirty-One National Conference, we will be staying close to home.  I am SO looking forward to that!

7)  Wedding bells!  My sister is getting married!!  And I can't wait!  We are beyond excited for her and Nate and can't wait until the big day arrives this summer.  (I am sure you will hear more about this as the day approaches.)

Lots on the Stape Family agenda but we are very excited to get through the next 5 days so that we can begin our summer of fun!!

Standing Still

As busy as our life is, as crazy as we are, as much as we are on the move and on the go all the time, part of life is standing still....and it is breaking my heart into tiny pieces.  We are in the application process for adoption #2!  We are very excited about this and can't wait for the day that Gus FINALLY gets to become a big brother.  And he will be a darn good big brother, I am sure of it! Every night I go to bed praying for that little one who will someday join our family.  Every night, I hope and pray that this process would move forward.  Every night, my heart breaks a little bit more.

We are currently at a stand still with our adoption process.  I'm not going to get into the details right now because it is still very raw.  I get very sad and angry which means that there is a lot of crying and snot.  It just isn't a good look for me and why inflict that upon myself right now.  Someday I will fill you in....just not today.  As for now, we simply ask for your prayers as we stand still in this process and wait....and wait....and wait....

....and wait....we haven't even gotten to the part yet where we are "on the list".   It is going to be a long wait.

But one thing that is NOT standing still right now is Gus.  Holy moly....that kid is ON THE MOVE!!  It is not very often that you see that kid walk or stay in one place.  He is often running or hopping or dancing.  But one thing he will sit for is a good book.  Yup!  Just like his Momma and his DaDoh.  We all love a good book and can be completely immersed in it.

I fall in love with this little boy more and more every day!  I am constantly amazed by what he does, what he knows and how much I could just squeeze him and kiss him and snuggle him all day long.  Of course that would be after I catch up with him!!

Where, O Where....

....has this blogger been?!?

Well, the simple answer....everywhere!!  I just finished coaching competitive cheer.  My girls had a pretty good season.  Unfortunately, we missed going to regionals by .65 of a point.  Seriously?!?!  Oh well.  My calendar is a lot less full now.  I no longer have practice 6 days a week.  Makes a huge difference!  I am almost not sure what to do with the free time.  Really today was the first day that I had free so what did I do??  I played dinosaurs with Gus, of course!

Gus has suddenly taken an interest in dinosaurs.  I love that he seems to have many interests.  Lately it has been Muppets, Lion King, Robin Hood, puzzles, books, trains and dinosaurs.  Seriously?  Who wouldn't love all of those things??  The problem with dinosaurs is that I was one of the "Otto Girls".  My sister, Annie, and I didn't play with dinosaurs.  We didn't learn all of their names.  Who knew I would ever need that information?  Now my son turns to me and asks each dinosaurs name!  And did you know that they have changed the names?  So the few I did have memorized....gone!  Can you believe it?  No more brontosaurus!!  So I have started doing my dino research.  We will see how quickly I can memorize this!!

If you ask Gus these days if he wants a baby brother or sister, he will tell you that he wants a baby sister!!  (If you recall, he also asked Santa for a baby sister, so this desire has not gone away.)  We are doing the best we can to help him out with his request!  All of our paperwork is turned in with the agency.  Next up is our home study.  I'm excited for our home study this time.  Mainly because it means that we are one step closer to welcoming baby #2.  I know what to expect this time with our home study.  The only difference is that we will have a different social worker for the home study than we normally have.  Our beloved social worker, Louise, will not be working with us again, but right now she is taking care of more important business....being a new mommy!  We were a little bummed that she wouldn't be doing our home study....but I think she has a darn good reason as to why!!

Stay tuned for more adoption news!  You know that we will fill you in here!!

Super Sunday