Four years....wow!

Can you believe it?  Can you believe that it has been FOUR years since I received that amazing phone call that changed my world!  (Okay...it will be four years tomorrow but I know that I have a busy day ahead of me so I won't have a chance to write.)  If you want to hear more about that day, you can go back and check out this post.  Little did I know what life was about to bring me.  Joy!  Pure joy! Little did I know that it would come in the form of this beautiful little soul!

Now that our family is complete and we have been blessed to become parents to two beautiful babies, it is funny to look at how our family came to be.  I am such a planner and nothing about our story was planned by me.  I have no doubt that God had planned this and I believe that the way He brought Gus into our life was absolutely perfect!  I had  about four months to prepare for his arrival.  I had a chance to wrap my head around it.  I had a chance to create a beautiful nursery and to fill it with everything baby!  I had a chance to fill the dressers and closet with an excessive amount of clothing.  I had a chance to rearrange it and reorganized it a plethora of times.  I had a chance to go to the remainder of the doctors appointments with J.  I had the chance to be in the delivery room when Gus took his first breath!  I had a chance to be ready!

I had no idea that I would never be ready enough!  How do you get ready for a pair of beautiful eyes to stare back at you with all of the trust in the world?  How do you get ready to discover that this beautiful little one has a nose just like yours and their is no scientific reason as to why?  How do you get ready for your heartstrings to be yanked so hard that you can barely breathe?  How do you possibly get ready for the best adventure in the world?  I thought I was ready.  Ready or not....this little man captured my heart instantly and continues to do so over and over again every day of his little life!

I had no idea on that snowy day in January of 2009, that my whole world would be changed with a simple phone call....but I am so happy that it did!

One Week Old

5 months old

20 months old

2 years old

3 years old

Whirlwind of Wonderful

So remember how I was just saying how patient I needed to be?  Who knew that my world would change so quickly!!  Keep in mind, I wrote that last blog post on Sunday night.

On Monday afternoon, we had our regular staff meeting after school.  This time we were meeting in departments.  As I sat there meeting with the other school counselor, Kathy, my cell phone rang.  I looked down and saw, "Dawn Baker".  Now for those of you who are "Teen Mom" fans, you know that Dawn works for Bethany Christian Services as a pregnancy counselor.  I immediately got anxious as I went to pick up the phone.  Kathy quickly picked up on what was happening and ran to get Joel.  Thank goodness we work in the same building and he could get down to the office quickly to be with me.

Dawn informed us that there was a baby girl born at 1:50 AM that morning and that her birthparents chose us!!  Holy moly!!  We were told to come to the hospital on Tuesday morning to meet our baby girl!

We spent Monday evening frantically pulling out all of our baby stuff.  Every baby bin from the basement was strewn about our living room and kitchen.  (And if you ask Joel, there are WAY too many bins.)  We pulled out any clothing of Gus' that was gender neutral.  Brought up the pack 'n plays.  (Yes, that is plural.) Brought up the swing and the carseat and the changing pad....

I ran to Target to pick up the essentials like diapers, formula, Dreft, a couple of baby girls outfits (so she didn't come home in blue) and Tums (I knew I would need those to get through the next couple of days.)

I had Gus stay in my bed that night (I wanted to snuggle with him and it was our last night as a family of 3) as I laid awake the whole night worrying about everything that was about to happen and crying for my little boy who had no idea that in 12 hours his world was going to change drastically.  I spent half of my night worrying about our next adoption process, praying for this baby, praying for her birthparents, praying for our family.  I spent the other half watching Gus sleep and praying for him.  Praying for the transition that our family was about to make.  Soaking up the last few hours of his only child life and praying for him as the big brother that he was about to become.  Sad that I didn't have time to do something special with him on the last day as a family of three.  It was a very long night full of anxiety and tears....no sleep.

The next day, Gus went to his sitter's house and Joel and I headed to work for a couple of hours before heading to the hospital.  Once we got to the hospital we met up with Dawn who had some paperwork for us to fill out.  She then went to meet with the birthparents for what seemed to be forever long.  She came back to get us and we began the longest walk in the world.  The hospital we were in was huge and the room we were in was super far away from the room that "S" was in.  The walk seemed to be long, awkward and full of anxiety.  (Remember the movie The Green Mile....for some reason that kept popping in my head as we made this long walk down to meet the birthparents.)

Once in the room, we met the birthparents, his mom, her mom and her grandparents.  Nine of us in a tiny hospital room.  It sure was cozy!  We had a chance to talk and get to know one another a little bit.  I was jumping out of my skin!  Pretty sure that my nails were digging into Joel's knee as I held his hand.  We were then led back to the waiting room to wait....and wait...and wait....

While we were waiting, Dawn was taking care of some stuff with the birthparents and also introduced the baby girl to her birth family.  (They had not yet seen her.)  After what seemed to be a long time, Dawn came back to get us.  We went back to the room that "S" was in.  Once we were there, "S" made a point to hand this beautiful little girl over to me.  We held her and loved her and took some pictures with her, with the birthparents, with the whole family.  We gave "S" and "C", the birthfather, a few minutes alone with the baby before we got to take her back down to the room that we were assigned.

We spent the rest of the day hanging out in that room waiting to be discharged.  The baby was born at 36 weeks so she had to pass a carseat test before we could take her home.  We had to wait a long time before the NICU had time to do the test.  We FINALLY left for home around 8 PM.  We pulled in the driveway at 9 PM to meet up with Gus and introduce him to his baby sister!

We are beyond thrilled to welcome

PENELOPE LIN ELIZABETH

to our family!  She is absolutely beautiful and the sweetest little thing!  Penny weighed in at 6 lbs 8 oz and was 18" long.  We are cautiously approaching the next few weeks as we wait for legal placement, but we are over the moon and head over heels in love with this beautiful little girl!!

More info and pictures to follow in the upcoming weeks.  In the mean time, prayers would be much appreciated as we wait out the risk period.

Standing Still

As busy as our life is, as crazy as we are, as much as we are on the move and on the go all the time, part of life is standing still....and it is breaking my heart into tiny pieces.  We are in the application process for adoption #2!  We are very excited about this and can't wait for the day that Gus FINALLY gets to become a big brother.  And he will be a darn good big brother, I am sure of it! Every night I go to bed praying for that little one who will someday join our family.  Every night, I hope and pray that this process would move forward.  Every night, my heart breaks a little bit more.

We are currently at a stand still with our adoption process.  I'm not going to get into the details right now because it is still very raw.  I get very sad and angry which means that there is a lot of crying and snot.  It just isn't a good look for me and why inflict that upon myself right now.  Someday I will fill you in....just not today.  As for now, we simply ask for your prayers as we stand still in this process and wait....and wait....and wait....

....and wait....we haven't even gotten to the part yet where we are "on the list".   It is going to be a long wait.

But one thing that is NOT standing still right now is Gus.  Holy moly....that kid is ON THE MOVE!!  It is not very often that you see that kid walk or stay in one place.  He is often running or hopping or dancing.  But one thing he will sit for is a good book.  Yup!  Just like his Momma and his DaDoh.  We all love a good book and can be completely immersed in it.

I fall in love with this little boy more and more every day!  I am constantly amazed by what he does, what he knows and how much I could just squeeze him and kiss him and snuggle him all day long.  Of course that would be after I catch up with him!!

Re-do...

We received a phone call from our agency.  Unfortunately, we have to re-do some of our paperwork...including our fingerprints.  Ugh!!  I was sure that we were all set....now we are at a stand still again!  Now we wait for the forms to arrive so that we can sit down and start filling them out.  I guess it is just one more hurdle for us to jump...we are getting pretty good at jumping over them these days!

Growing the Stape Fam...

Big news!  We have officially started the process for our second adoption!  We dropped off the paperwork today at Bethany Christian Services.  I remember when it was just the two of us and we dropped off our paperwork for our first adoption.  SO nerve-wracking!  We had no idea what to expect and what we were in for...but we were excited.  We celebrated by going out to Texas Roadhouse afterwards.  Little did we know at that time how incredibly blessed we would be when Baby Spike (aka. Gus) joined our family!

Today, the three of us took our paperwork up to the agency to submit.  And then as a family we went out to dinner at Red Robin.  Joel told Gus we were going to dinner and asked him what he wanted for dinner.  Gus' response?  "Bugger (burger), buh-byes (french fries) and....A DIET COKE!"  We haven't laughed that hard in a long time!  (And no, Gus doesn't really get to drink diet coke.)  He definitely offers some comic relief!!

We can't wait until the day when we get to post on here about Baby Stape #2.  You will hear  about the baby on here as Sassy or Spunky depending on if it is a boy or a girl.  We welcome you to join us on our journey and follow as we update you on our blog.  We ask that you keep our family and our future baby and his/her birthparents in your prayers!  This can be a very rough and unpredictable road to travel down.  We are preparing for a long wait, but we are very excited for the Stape Fam to grow again.

Race for Home

Last year, the Stapleton family took part in the 1st Bethany Christian Services Race for Home. Bethany Christian Services in the agency that we worked with for our adoption. Last year we did this as a little family of three. Check out my blogpost from last year. It was then that I determined that I was going to get more family and friends involved this year. Bethany Christian Services is an amazing organization! They have truly wonderful people working for them. We are so looking forward to working with them again as we hope to adopt again soon.



Bethany Christian Services provides a variety of services within the community and they are able to do because of the donations that they receive throughout the year. This event is just one of the many ways that they are able to do that. As a family, we are hoping that you will be willing to do one of the following to help Bethany Christian Services this summer and participate in our family tradition of Racing for Home.

1) Pray. This is free...won't cost you a thing! Pray for the families out there waiting to become complete by adopting a child. Pray for the children out there who need a family and a home of their own. Pray for the men and women who work for Bethany Christian Services. Pray for the birthparents out there who have either made the tough decision to make an adoption plan or haven't yet made that decision. Pray that more people come to learn about foster care and adoption and are more accepting of it. (I know...you are thinking, how could anyone not be open to it?? Trust me...I have met some who are not!) If you will be praying, please let up know by leaving a comment on this post!

2) Cheer. This will cost you the gas it takes to get there. We would love to have you there at the walk to cheer us on. Joel and Joe Conner will be running and Gus and I will be doing the walk. We would love to see your smiling faces there supporting all of the runners and walkers.


3) Walk/Run. We would be more than honored if you would walk or run next to us. I think it would be so cool to have family and friends make this a tradition with us. (I'm crying just thinking about it.) We know that we are very lucky to have so many family and friends who are so supportive. How awesome would it be to see them together with our family?!? If you are interested, you can register online at http://www.bethany.org/A55798/bethanyWWW.nsf/0/E2E33FA01E51AB9A852576F7006626A3.


4) Donate. I'm not one to solicit money from others, but I do feel very strongly about what Bethany Christian Services does. Without them, I would not be the mom of a beautiful little boy who calls me "Momma" and calls Joel "DaDoh". I am very blessed to have Gus in my life. I can't imagine life without him in it. (Yup...you guessed it...I am crying again.) I can't wait for Gus to become a big brother someday and I hope and pray that other families out there get to wrap their arms around a child with the help of BCS. If you feel so called as to donate to Bethany Christian Services, you can fill out this form and mail it back in to BCS or you can give your donations to Joel or myself. http://www.bethany.org/pdfs/sponsorshipletter.pdf (Since Gus is not registered, please use my name as the participant.) Note- This money does not go to our family. It goes to Bethany Christian Services to help with the programs that they run and the services that they offer.


We are really excited to participate in our 2nd Race for Home. We love the tradition that we have started for our family and hope that you will join us in one way or another!

The Call

Two years ago today I was supposed to have a cheerleading meet.  Unfortunately, it was canceled due to the weather.  So home I went after school.  Once I got home, I noticed the red blinking light on my answering machine.

"Hi Beth and Joel!  My name is Dawn Baker.  I am calling from Bethany Christian Services.  Please call me as soon as you get this message.  You can call me at .......until 5 and then on my cell phone at ......until 10 PM tonight.  Talk to you soon."

That's weird I thought.  We JUST updated our adoption application 2 weeks ago, what did they want now?  I called the number, asked for Dawn and was greeted by the most cheerful voice.

"Hi Beth! So glad that you were able to call back so quickly.  I have a birthmom who really wants to meet with you and Joel to see if you are a match!"

I almost fell over.  My legs felt weak and I had to sit down.  I sat on the bottom step of our stairs as Dawn gave me some background about J and K, the birthparents.  I remember my hands shaking, my voice wouldn't work.  It was all I could do not to fall completely apart.  Was this real?  Was this lady really calling to tell me that there was someone who chose US?

Dawn and I set up a time to meet with J the next week to see if we were a match and before we hung up, Dawn mentioned one more thing.  "Oh by the way....it's a boy!"

I thanked Dawn, hung up the phone and still shaking like a leaf, I tried to call Joel.  Joel was coaching wrestling at the time and his wrestling meet still happened (despite the weather).  I called Joel about 27 times and he ignored me every time. 

I decided that I couldn't tell anyone about this until I told Joel so I had to figure out how to spend my time.  So what did I do...I went shopping!  I remember wandering around Home Goods for about an hour while talking on my cell phone with Dawn.  She had called back with some more information so I got to at least talk to her a little bit.  After Home Goods (yes, I bought some really fun stuff while I was there!) I wandered over to Target.  I spent another two hours wandering around Target. Up and down each aisle.  I found myself in toys and purchased the first baby toy for our household.  I bought a green football for our little boy.

Finally, Joel was home and we could celebrate.  There were lots of tears and both completely stunned.  We were in disbelief that this was happening and so quickly for us.  We told only our family and a few very close friends and kept our fingers crossed for our meeting with J.  We are so happy that J chose us!  The past two years have flown right by and we are loving every minute of it!!

Race for Home 2010

We were so excited when Bethany Christian Services, the adoption agency that we worked with, sent out info about the Race for Home 5K.  We did not bat an eye before deciding to participate.  How could we not participate?  How could we not support the agency that helped us build our family?  How could we not help other families experience the same joy that we have been blessed by?  So we decided to sign up as walkers and raise some money.  We weren't sure that we were going to be able to actually walk in it since Gus can't walk yet and we weren't sure what the path was going to be like and if it would be stroller friendly.  But regardless, we were going to raise money and go participate in some way.  We decided that this was going to become a family tradition for us and year after year we would raise money and participate in some way. 

The moment that we arrived we were greated by such warm smiles.  For an agency that covers 17 counties in eastern Michigan and helped process over 120 adoptions in 2009 alone, I am always impressed that they know exactly who we are.  We did participate in an info night earlier this year to represent their domestic infant adoption program, but we never expected that some of the staff members that we never worked with would remember us.  And maybe it is because our son does not have a very common name that we are easy to remember.  I like to think it is because Gus is just so adorable that he is hard to forget.  (I may be a little bit biased.)  We heard quite a few voices yell, "GUS!" as they welcomed us.  The staff at BCS is really wonderful and we are so lucky that we got to work with them.

Dawn was Gus' birthmom's pregnancy counselor.  She was the one who first called to tell us that there was a match and she was the one who held our hands and prayed during the happy and the tough times last summer.  Yes, she is on MTV's "Sixteen and Pregnant" and is a superstar, but she was our superstar first!  She is absolutely amazing and I thank God for her!!

Louise was our social worker.  She came to visit us after Gus was born and walked us through the adoption process all the way through finalization.  Louise got married last fall and Gus was very excited to send her "drumsticks" (cooking utensils) for her wedding gift.  We thought that we were so clever!!  Louise was fabulous to work with and when we apply for our second adoption, we will be requesting to work with her again.  Not only is she super fun, but she lives close to us so it only makes sense.  (She is also one of those people that I feel that I could be great friends with but that would probably be tricky to have friends as clients.  We will wait until we are done adopting, then we will pounce and make her and her hubby be friends with us.)

We are so very lucky to have BCS as part of our extended family and can't wait to work with them again when we expand our family.  And you better believe, we will be getting the rest of our family and friends more involved in the Race for Home as time goes on.